It's official! I am PREGNANT!!!

I can't believe I am writing this. After getting a couple positive home pregnancy tests yesterday and this morning, I went a day early to get my blood test. It came back positive!

8dp5dt=86.5

The nurse said that was a pretty high number considering I went in a day early. I will go back on Monday for a repeat beta test to make sure my levels are rising, and I think my first ultrasound will be June 24! I have started a new blog, so I think this might be my last entry for this blog. My IVF journey was a crazy time and I want to keep this out there for others who may be going through the same thing. My new baby blog is...

http://reedbaby.blogspot.com/

I'm the luckiest woman alive!

OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think I just got a BFP this morning!!!!! Well, like I said, that last HPT didn't make it to Friday! The only problem is I looked at it past the 5 minute window. However, I still had the one from Monday in the trash (ok, I know I'm gross!!!), but compared to the one from Monday, there is definitely a line! I can't believe it. I didn't tell DH I was going to test. When I looked again and saw the line, I went to get DH and told him, "Honey, I think there is something you should see." I showed it to him, he saw the line too, and then I started to cry. I still don't know what to think. It is so hard to believe after 18 cycles of nothing. I am going out today to buy some more HPTs, but DH says I should just wait until my beta on Friday. I am still a little worried about a chemical PG or a miscarriage, but I can't worry about that. I have to think that at least I can get PG!!! It is dream. Now I can look at baby stuff and not feel guilty!

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Update: BFP on digital too! I called the RE's office and moved my beta to tomorrow morning! Here is a pic of my bfp!!

Bad, Bad Me!!!!

Ok, I caved! I don't even want to admit it, but I caved and did an HPT this morning. BFN! Well, I am only 5dp5dt, so it still is very early, but darn! I did the terrible thing that every woman experiencing infertility has done, I went back and looked at the darn thing about an hour later. Squeezing my eyesight, it looked like a faint line, but I think I am kidding myself, plus it was WAY passed the 2 minute time frame. I have one more test left, and I really don't know what to do. This morning I was just going to throw the damn thing out so it wouldn't taunt me, but now I am wondering if I should keep it for Friday morning. My problem is I don't think it will make it to Friday. I am sooo weak! I guess I should just throw it away; it wasn't an expensive one, just a cheapie off the Internet. I've been a little crampy, and really trying not to put too much into it. My boobs are a little sore, but I think that is from the PIO. I was having lots of horrible heartburn, but that is better. I still have it a little, but nothing like a few days ago. Tomorrow is the 4th of July, and the big swimming party at my parent's house. The RE said no swimming, so it really is going to be hard. I am always a swimmer on the 4th, especially for our annual water volleyball game. I know everyone will be asking me why I'm not swimming. We haven't really told my family about the IVF, just a few that needed to know or my really close family. I am going to have to lie because I just think I am ready to tell everyone. I know they would be supportive, but I don't want to have everyone tell me to "Just Relax" or all the other stupid things family says that pisses me off even though I know they are just trying to be nice. I don't want to hear my family say, "Just adopt, then for sure you will get pregnant." I think I will go with the "ear infection" lie. Told DH and we will be on the same lie. Just need to talk to my parents and brother so we can have a plan! On a related but different subject, I have a friend on one of the message boards that I am on that went through the IVF cycle just about the same time as I did. I am really hoping she gets her BFP, but at the same time I am afraid she will get her BFP and I won't and be left out again. It just seems like I have made so many friends with girls that have been TTC, and they have all gotten PG and went on and left me behind. I don't want to be left behind!!

The DAMN hpts are calling me!

This sucks. I am going crazy and I still have 6 more days until beta! DH and I went to the grocery store and we went down the isle of HPTs! I stopped and stared! Dh asked me what I was staring at, and I pointed to those EVIL htps sitting on the shelf taunting me! I asked DH if I should get one, and he replied,"No! You only have 6 more days." DAMN HIM AND HIS FAITH IN ME!!!! grrrrrrr I did find 2 old cheapie tests in my drawer. Even now they are calling to me!! I'm going to do my best to leave them alone!! Today I guess you can say I am sure that this IVF didn't work. I know there are days all IVFers think the cycle is a failure, and I guess today is my day. Tonight we are having my parents over for dinner. Maybe that will get my mind off of things.